I want a Puppy!

I've always wanted to have a puppy since I was young.
But, mom never allows me to do so.
She dislikes dog and is afraid of the mess.
I've promised her that I would be fully responsible for that.
But still, she stands strong on her point.
:(

I always love the potluck season,
Apart from the foods and meet ups with all the relatives and cousins,
I can play with the puppies.
There will always be 2 Poodles and 1 Shih tzu.
Damn adorable I could say.

I'm so gonna get one when I'm financially stable.
Perhaps it would be the time where we owned a house together.
Hopefully he's a pet lover too.
Isn’t it sweet?
Just like the movie ‘Marley and Me’. A very emotional movie.. sobs..
Though it’s still a long way to go, but I’ll make this dream come true. :)
Maybe a Poodle for me, and a Golden Retriever for him? LOL.

F-R-E-E

Whee... I'm officially unemployed now..

Just completed 1 of my failed CIMA paper last Thursday, saw alot of familiar faces that I met on last sitting.. >.<>

I wanna go for Jay's coming concert!

I wanna go for movie!

I wanna go Jogoya!

I wanna join back Celebrity Fitness.

I wanna go shopping cos most of my baju doesn't fit me anymore. :'(

I wanna get rid of my lemaks... @.@

I wan my body back to its shape...

sigh!

till then. continue my drama.. :)

Appreciation

Had a chat with Daddy this morning, he was really depressed and disappointed with the issue facing by the Liew big family. Grandpa just passed away four years ago, and all the brothers and sisters starting to fight for their shares.

I thought this only happened in dramas, but I witnessed it on the other day. One of the sibling were shouted like a mad dog asking for appreciation for taking care of their father.

Appreciation is something that you EARNED for it.. and not something that you ASKED for it on what you've done.

You said you would rather die than taking care of him. Fuck you! I don't give a damn la whether you're my uncle or what.. just imagine your dad, my grandpa were there listening what you've said.. How would he felt? sigh~

It really scares me; Money is really a powerful beast.

I saw fine lines and wrinkles on dad's face. No more black and healthy hair but white and dry. Everything he does is for the sake of the big family but no one appreciate it. What they know is to wait for the money to reach their hand. sigh. I wonder will I be so materialistic when I've grown up? :(

Foods!

Was exploring the Picasa software that I just downloaded.. and TA-DA!












These are all the foods that I cooked or ate when I was in UK. Though it might look bland or whatsoever.. But it's a great accomplisment for me ok. Someone who never need to worry what's-for-dinner for the past 22 years! LOL.

okay, back to study! :D

smiley face =)

Well, some of my friends were so concerned about me regarding my previous post. You guys never know how important are those cheer up messages to me. It made me feel like I'm still 'some one' in this world. I'm not alone. Thank you!

Though I don't know who visited my blog. But I know they're still some body who cares for me, who wanna know how am I doing etc. Especially you. Yes you! Do leave me a message, and it'll definitely make my day! =)

For those who curious about my previous post, hmm.. make it simple. Both of us confronted each other, and we spurted out all our dissatisfactions. I hope things will eventually improve between both of us.

Currently addicted to Criminal Minds. Completed the 6th season and waiting for the release of new epi! ANTM is one of my current addiction too! arrgh.. I gotta start studying..

15 days left only..

My degree is like a shit, I can't afford not to pass my CIMA now.. Work hard for it LMJ! :)

I'm a bitch?

I know I'm the bitch you're referring to. Seriously, I was being called as a bitch for the first time in my life. Yes, BITCH! Never in my life had I thought this would happen to me. I tried my best to be nice to everyone all these while. Though some times I felt tired of being overly NICE. People tend to taking advantage over me. But seriously, I don't mind as long as you don't cross the border of my patient level. But, BITCH! I was seriously heartache. Especially being called by you. The one who used to treat me like a princess..

Am I really that nasty to you?

I'm confused..

You said

"After so long, deep inside me, a tiny little bit of me wants to talk to you again, hence, all the apology and long-winded stories. Turns out, you're still the same."

What do you mean by I'm still the same? What you expect me to do? I tried to talk to you. I tried to ask you out. But how you responded me? The way you talked to me and the way you talk to others were totally contrast. It’s like I’m forcing you. Do you expect me to act like nothing, hypnotizing myself that you’re still the old you?

People are afraid of rejection. So do me.

I need encouragement. A LOT A LOT of it. You knew it perfectly.

Another thing, you said “What happened to what you told me? What happened to all the promises? It turns out to be all bullshits from you again.”

I know it’s very irresponsible of saying I forgotten what I’ve promised you. I admit that I don’t keep promises all the time. Not that I’m intentionally. I have an awful memory cells. I swear. Or perhaps I’m selective towards memories. I’ve gone through a lot. I lost the most precious person in my life when I was young. Ever since, I’m selective towards remembering things. Especially promises that I’m made to someone I cared a lot. I’m afraid of unable to fulfilling it, so I chose not to remember it. I know this is bullshits. I shouldn’t have promise it if I can’t fulfill it right? Sorry is the only word I can say now. I know it wouldn’t change anything. And I would be grateful if you remind me again the promises that I’ve broken.

Which I know it’s impossible, because it’s not important for you anymore.

I shouldn’t start making empty promises from now on. I know it hurts.

You know, both of you were the one that understand me the most. I swear. Not even my mom understands me like u two. That’s why I’m afraid. I’m afraid of exposing too much of myself.

I have low self-esteem. Especially towards people that I cared.

I’m afraid of how they see me as.

I’m afraid of them hating me after knowing the real me.

That’s why I usually don’t initiate myself. Not that I’m arrogant. I’m just too coward.

Sorry for being a bitch to you. Sorry for causing you dilemma.

And I guess you really mean it when you said you’re seriously done with me.

Friendship for 9 years and it just vanished.

In conclusion, I don’t deserve to have you guys.